I’ve avoided writing in this blog yet have wanted to so very many occasions in the last year or so.
I’ve felt like a pressure-cooker of emotions and words. So, instead I keep, carry and write in a private journal just to take the edge off. (Actually have done so anyway off and on for years)
The lack of blog posts? It’s not because I’ve nothing to say- it’s because I’ve too much to say and so much to write about and it’s far too important to me to mess it up and potentially stumble over my words and be misunderstood.
I think we all hate being misunderstood. It’s a mutual human need actually. To be understood. To receive empathy.
And for a writer this has been an excruciating and frustrating fear.
I’ve felt silenced. I’ve read between the lines and came to the conclusion that it was my only choice. To keep peace. To stear clear of the vortex of word wars we all so easily and unintentionally get sucked into.
I heard someone say that “facebook” was satanic. I scoffed a bit at that but, you know, I truly think we’ve all fallen down that hellish rabbit hole. Myself included. I tried not to, trust me. But….well, you know.
I think we’re all seeing a great deception on the news and our social media platforms- the media is desperately and successfully causing such dissention, hate, and misunderstanding. Just try and look away and pretend to not notice the many hotbed issues these days.
Yes, some very tragic things are occurring. I’m not saying we should bury our heads in the sand. However, we’ve got to keep our eyes on what is really happening. What truly matters. Because we’re all becoming so distracted in the heat of all these chaotic emotions.
Do I have an opinion or strong feeling about a few of the popular issues at hand? Absolutely. But, I’ve also seen so many different perspectives to each. It isn’t always easy to pinpoint what the “right” thing is. There are some very murky waters to tread here.
I went through a personal crisis nearly a year ago that pretty much knocked the wind out of me for months. Surprisingly I found myself going through a grieving process although I hadn’t lost anyone to death.
Sadly, the only way I could find someone who could truly say they’d experienced what I was going through was on a private Facebook support group. If it wasn’t for that, I think I probably would’ve just deleted my account.
It’s truly disheartening that in this age of information (or should I say MISinformation?) that we all seem to be totally missing it. I feel it in my gut the way one feels when you know-that-you-know you’re being deceived.
So, I’m on a personal mission to keep it simpler. I’m striving for more quality in EVERY moment in the same way I try to avoid junk food. It tastes sooooo good but…it’s really not essential or nutritious. I now feel the same about Facebook- not essential and definitely not healthy…and only to be partaken in small portions.
Because I’m emerging from a season of grieving and heartache I’ve avoided writing in my blog. But, oh how I’ve missed it!
It’s now, thankfully, a season of Spring for me in my life. I’m easing into and savoring more of the activities and interests I’d put aside to heal. I wish I could write about what I’ve been through but I can’t. So instead, I’ll share what I can about other things.
Just a parting word: if there’s anyone reading who’s ever felt silenced or been told that what you feel isn’t rational or valid- don’t despair and don’t “go it alone.” Pour your heart out to the Lord. If you also just must have that human connection or shoulder to cry on pray and ask God to guide you to just the right ear of understanding. I did and received just that and it made all the difference.
To be understood by even one is healing relief.